I have the song "Homesick" by Mercy Me in my playlist on my blog. I have heard the song before, but I guess I had never really listened to the words before. I really listened to it for the first time a couple of weeks ago and I swear I felt like I could have written it myself( not literally written the song-just the message). It says everything that I feel. I have been a Christian for about 16 years. I have thought about Heaven a lot before, but now I think about it so much. Jon and I actually talked to our preacher about this when we met with him to talk about Ella's funeral service. During her funeral he brought it up and said that Heaven will be all the more sweeter now-because Ella will be waiting there for us. I know that I will see Ella again when I get to Heaven...and that is what I long for so bad. Somedays I feel like everything is just too much for me. I feel like this road has been so long since we found out that Ella had anencephlay and sometimes I don 't see a light at the end of the tunnel. Those are the times when I think of Heaven-and seeing my sweet baby again. My favorite part of the song is "in Christ, there are no goodbyes. In Christ there is no end. So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have to see you again." As the song says, "I have never been more homesick than now."
I love you Ella!
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